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I work on the reception area of a large Corporate Law Firm.

One day a man came in off the street, he was obviously very angry.

“I want to see someone sharpish” he said.

“Right Sir,” I said “How can we help you?”

“You can run off and get me a lawyer naaaa.”

I must have still looked confused, because he sighed as if I was stupid and said, “It’s her init, she’s doing my nut in!”

”I nodded and quickly came around to his side of the reception desk, because I realised I’d need to lead him away from the area quickly – a couple of important clients from the US were waiting on a couch watching with interest.Then suddenly a very large woman burst through the doors behind him, huffing and puffing.

“Robbie!!!! She screamed “I love ya you know I do!”

“I aint’ saying nothing to ya, you talk to my lawyer.”

She looked at me and suddenly I felt afraid.“Listen luv” She spat at me “you get your dirty little claws out a him, he’s not your next meal ticket.”

“I’m not a lawyer, I’m a receptionist and we don’t handle divorce cases, we’re not that type of law firm, I’m so sorry.”

“Listen to ‘er  ‘we don’t handle divorces’ – we DON’T NEED A DIVORCE YOU CHEEKY CAAAAA!!!!!”

At that point my colleague arrived and managed to coax them to the door. I turned around after they’d gone – to see one of our clients laughing so hard she was in tears, she said it was the best thing she’d ever seen over here and had been coming to London for twenty years. I bet she couldn’t wait to get back to the states to tell her friends.